Monday, September 22, 2008

This Is Just Too Good

As many of you know DU has the top 10 conservative idiots. This week # 10 is a real winner

Gabriel Schwartz

And finally, Gabriel Schwartz, a Republican delegate from Denver, was a real hit at the recent Republican National Convention. During an interview at the Convention, he spewed forth these classics:

REPORTER: What is your vision for change under a John McCain administration?

SCHWARTZ: Less taxes and more war.

(snip)

REPORTER: Where should the United States bomb next?

SCHWARTZ: Iran, baby.

(snip)

REPORTER: So what would that look like? What would a war on Iran look like?

SCHWARTZ: Hopefully just bomb the hell out of them from the sky.

(snip)

REPORTER: How would we pay for a war in Iran?

SCHWARTZ: We should plant a flag. Take the oil. Take the money. We deserve reimbursement.

Three cheers for the solid conservative values of piracy and theft!

Now, are you ready for the hilarious irony? One day later...

He met her in the bar of the swank hotel and invited her to his room. Once there, the woman fixed the drinks and told him to get undressed.

And that, the delegate to the Republican National Convention told police, was the last thing he remembered.

When he awoke, the woman was gone, as was more than $120,000 in money, jewelry and other belongings.

(snip)

In a statement released today, Gabriel Nathan Schwartz, 29, of Denver, put the figure at much less.

"It's embarrassing to admit that I was a target of a crime. I was drugged and had about $50,000 of personal items stolen, not the inflated number that the media is reporting from an inaccurate police report," he said.

Late edit: A picture of the douche.



4 comments:

Sergei Andropov said...

Seems like a friendly sort of fellow.

Anonymous said...

Who's dumb enough to travel with valuables worth that amount on their person, anyway?

Anonymous said...

Um a delegate to the McCain Palin ticket.

Anonymous said...

Maybe he was hoping to become a lobbyist...never know who you have to, um, influence...

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