Wednesday, October 6, 2010

The View From My Ass

So tonight I go to Creighton Prep to see my nephews Freshman team play Creighton Prep's Freshman B team I have to give those Crazy Catholics credit. Here they are getting $10,000 plus a year from parents to send their kids to their school and they are still out raising money for everything under the sun. They had kids selling T-Shirts to send them to the Vatican or some such place and parents selling mood rings to raise money to bring in the Pope and best of all a concession stand so well stocked that it would make the Bob Devaney Sports Center proud. One could buy most anything for the right price. A bottle of Pepsi costs $2 or 6 Hail Mary's. Most of the time at these Freshman games especially Freshman B games your lucky if the school hosting the event can be bothered to turn the scoreboard on and if they do don't count on it being accurate. Not Creighton Prep! They had a PA announcer working at a Freshman game! The guy was pretty funny too. Pretty sure he was a member of the mafia judging by his voice. My Nephews team got up 34-0 at the start of the 4th quarter and we had to leave because my youngest nephews flag football game was getting ready to start and I promised to make one of his games this week and the next one is Thursday and I already have plans for Thursday. They lost bad bad bad! I don't know what the score was and honestly with 8 year olds what does it matter? They were running around having fun so what if the other team scored 7 or 8 times and My Nephews team didn't score at all?

After the football we stopped off at Perkins to grab a bite to eat. I don't know how many of you know who Larry Groznik is but he is a "columnist" for the onion. Larry is uber nerdy and usually starting message board fights with his friends because they either don;t share his knowledge or his passion over such things as comic books and Sci Fi Movies. Tonight at Perkins I sat at a table that was next to Larry Grozniks's table. The guy just prayed that nobody went and saw Star Wars in 3 D and then went on a 30 minute rant about how awful the prequels were. It would have been fine if he just hated the prequels but it didn't stop there he went on a rant about character inconsistencies the lack of Padme's personalities every single plot whole the miss use of such small time characters in the films I had to struggle with my memory to remember them as I over heard the rant. Amazingly he had the nerve to say that other Star Wars fans were too serious and part of the problem. Even more amazing was there was a woman with him who was just as upset of the horrid plot holes of Revenge of the Sith as it pertains to Return of The Jedi. You know the one that almost everybody points out? It took all the restraint I could muster to not turn around and say for suck sake get a life.

Most people know I love James Bond. Books, Movies, comics you name I love it. I have seen You Only Live Twice maybe 98,000 times. I know that it is ludicrous for SPECTRE to have a hollowed out volcano for their base of operation. I also know that Kissy Suzuki could not possibly swim from the Volcano to island get the Ninja's and have all of them swim back in 6 minutes to save the day. Finally I know that a hollowed out dormant volcano shouldn't erupt with Lava when it is blown up. It's dormant. I find none of these things, preposterous though they may be, to be worth dwelling on when I watch You Only Live Twice. I question none of them just like I don't question Bloefeld when he has his gun on Bond and shots Mr. Osato instead. Why? because it's A FUCKING JAMES BOND MOVIE! No more no less. So Yes I know Padme died giving birth to Leah and yes I know Leah claims when asked to have memories of her Mother! Life goes on Larry! Life goes on! Well maybe his doesn't. This is why BTW I don't do Commander Bond or any other fandom message board like that. It's also why I find these high brow academic studies on things like james Bond and Star Wars by people with 6 PHD'S to be a precious waste of pulp.

Finally on the subject of Star Wars I thought about trying to get into the literary world of Star Wars so I looked up Star Wars literary cannon on the net. HOLY FUCK SHIT! 9 bazillion different books by 87 gazillion different authors! It was enough to make me let out a collective WTF! By my count and this "unofficial" but it's close. Taking in The Fleming, Amis, Gardner, Benson, Weinberg, Faulks, Higson and that really crappy James Bond Jr. 003 1/2 novel from the 60's there are about 50 James Bond Novels. It's a fairly high number but nothing like Star Wars. Shit even with the 13 or 14 graphic novels from titan it's still a much smaller number.

So then I got on line and saw that a certain person posting anonymously (Planet Bob Peters) had question my insecurity. Yes you read that right a person post as "anonymous, no name no nothing question my insecurity. Then My Sister called she had a few choice names for me because I won't take my Brother to the county hospital or take him off her hands so she can go back to having that congiline of losers go in and out her front door. After the 3rd or 4th insult I hung up on her and when she called back right away I hit talk and end. For years I've said I have 2 Brothers and 2 Sisters But in reality a world my Sisters and other Brother do not live, I have one Brother.

Thursday I take Manhattan! Manhattan Kansas that is. It's only a 2 /2 hour drive down there and game time is at 6:45 so I am leaving Thursday afternoon and will be back early Friday morning and hopefully in a good mood. And for the record Planet Ankeny is no longer welcomed here so his posts will be dealt with. If either Jonathan or RF see them they too can erase them or do with them as they see fit.

I think that is all I have to say...Oh I haven't talked to my Mexican soul Sister in 2 days I hope she is doing fine and all of that. She would be proud of me I read some Poe. The Black Cat. That is one weird dude!



1 comment:

et said...

Well, Count, I agree with Groznik about the horribleness of the prequels and might well, if there, have been at his table declaiming right alongside him, while you winced nearby. But we are in agreement that I'd never take it public in the blogosphere, much less academia. And as for the proliferation of SW books out there? My collection is a little more selective than that. A fair bit of it I find little more than glorified fanfic. I like Timothy Zahn's stuff and the YA books by Jude Watson. The rest of it, not so much.

Sorry for the Bob drama and even more so for the family drama. You may know we've had our fair share of the latter this year, and I'm sure there is more in store.

Your info re: Planet is noted and will be acted upon as needed.

Have fun on your (brief) trip, and let us know What's The Matter With Kansas upon your return!

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