Random Questions: What the f@#k!? Edition

From Taylor Swift's surprising victory at Sunday night's Grammy Awards, to the jaw-dropping results of identified Republicans across the nation, here are my questions to the stories that had me saying either 'Oh my God!' or 'What the f@^k!?'

- This question is repetitive, but it does bear repeating: How can the base of lock-step, Fox News Republicans be this damn stupid?? A poll released by Daily Kos/Research 2000 reveals some startling numbers about the base that I thought couldn't be any more oblivious to their own head scratching stupidity. Here are some of the results:

• 39% of Republicans want President Obama to be impeached.

He's been in office for a year, for christsakes! Let him plunge America into an unnecessary war based on lies, subvert the Constitution to suit his needs, and ignore a national disaster for two weeks before we talk about impeachment.

• 63% think Obama is a socialist.

This isn't anything new. These morons believe anyone with a functioning brain who questions 1/4 of their "conventional wisdom" must be a card-carrying commie, or a fellow traveler.

• 31% want contraception to be outlawed.

Just what we need: no protection, so idiots are allowed to breed and make more idiots! Jesus, doesn't anyone in that base understand the concept of "pulling out?"

• 73% think gay people should not be allowed to teach in public schools.

Exactly what do these idiots believe will happen if Mr. Garrisan teaches the little ones? On second thought....

- Why did Kanye have to open his trap five months ago? Last September, rap superstar and egomaniac Kanye West went up onstate at the MTV VMA's and announce his disappointment that Beyocne didn't win a moonman for "Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)," by ruining Taylor Swift's moment. Thanks to his unbelievable stupidity and arrogance, Taylor Swift won Album of the Year at the Grammy Awards on Sunday. Dude, all of this could have been avoided: your no-show at the Grammys, your stupid ass stunt, Barack Obama calling you a jackass off-camera, and Swift losing to Lady Gaga for the title. This is your monster, Mr. West. Now we all have to put up with it. Thanks, dickhead.

- Late Edit by Jonathan: Exactly what the hell is the Apple iPad? What is it supposed to do? And why the hell do we need it? I love just about everything Apple CEO Steve Jobs has created, but his latest game-changing invention has me stumped. Is it a next-gen notebook PC? Is supposed to be an electronic notepad? It looks mega-cool, but I don't see the need to go out and buy this.