A Dip Into the Fundie End of the Gene Pool

I'll admit it - I have a weakness for the collection of rampant nuttiness that can be found in the archives at Fundies Say The Darndest Things. Think the work of our fave Jeremiah, only wackier and far less coherent. And, in the absence of any fresh rants from him worth commenting on lately, I thought I'd pop into FSTDT and see what was noteworthy this week.

As always, they didn't disappoint. Forge ahead, Gentle Reader, and marvel at the cognitive dissonance.

From The I Saw It, So It Must Be Real File:

WYSIWYG — What you see is what you get!!

The Biblical geocentric model of the universe is called WYSIWYG—what you see is what you get...True science is supposed to be based on observation. We see the array of stars wheeling around the earth approximately daily, and we motorize our telescopes to follow their steady motion. We see the sun rising and setting daily. We see the planets doing roughly the same thing, and we see the moon following them on a somewhat different schedule, all revolving around the earth as our eyes testify.

There is no justification at all from what we observe to arbitrarily assume the stars to be fixed and the earth rotating. The beauty of geocentricity is that what you see is what you get! It is a simple and readily understandable scenario for those who are willing to believe what their eyes tell them, and make the mental transition back to the instinctive reference frame of a stationary earth.

Oh, now, come ON. This is even worse than the Creationist Museum, with people putting saddles on dinosaurs and trying to call it science! What's next? I see a rainbow, so instead of learning about refraction and moisture in the atmosphere, I will assume that God is fingerpainting? I go to see Avatar in 3D and I believe that blue aliens are really flying right at me? And don't get me started on how freshly silly this is coming from a group that very likely bases its faith on the manifestly UN-seen.

From The "Super Sunday" Word of Prophecy File:

We are in our 111th congress and 111th supreme court justice
we are also in the 111th pope of saint malachy's prophecy
44 kings of Israel, 44 presidents and now 44 super bowls.

I think this is a numerical sign that we are at a juncture of some judgement about to come to the US and WW 111

Has anyone else received numerical synchronicity signs from the Lord? I have like, alot of them.

I won't even touch any of the grammar or spelling. But..."44 super bowls"? Really?? I guess the new question is, whose team colors would Jesus paint his face with? All-out wacko. I wonder who runs the Seraphim Football Pool.

From ET's This-Time-It's-Personal File:

(Wiccans in the Military)

I feel this is a devastating blow to the core of who and what America used to stand for. I would rather die at the hand of terrorist or enemies than to be protected or represented by pagans. In the Old Testament did God's make armies full of devil worshipers prosper and defeat the enemy? Uh, no. So then why do we think it is okay and that God will continue to protect and make us victorious if we are allowing open worship of false gods? That's like setting up an idol of Baal right next to the temple of God. Do you think He is going to stand by quietly? As you can tell, I am furious.

OK, you who know me know my reaction to this one, going in. (A) Ignorance: pagans don't buy into the Christian god/devil dichotomy, so this is a moot and invalidated point; (B) Surprise! There have been Wiccans and pagans in the military - and, quietly and unobtrusively, everywhere else you go! - for a long time, they just haven't had the right for their faith to be recognized on military headstones until recently (one good thing to come, against all odds, during the 8 years of BushCo); and (C) so far, I'm not seeing any kind of divine intervention stepping in to warn off those scary pagans from serving their country just like many Jews, Sikhs, Atheists and a host of other non-Christian members of the US military do. But, then, if you'd "rather die at the hand [sic.] of terrorist [sic.] or enemies," dear FSTDT poster, please knock yourself out and enlist. I daresay I will appreciate your service far more than you appreciate that of those with whom you disagree.

And, finally, From The "What I Tell You Is True...From a Certain Point of View" File:

Many people think that Star Wars is a good movie. This may be entertaining, but in fact it is evil. Why, you ask, is a tool for millions of Satan's favorite movie? The answer is the police force.

Throughout all three movies, people always said that in May the Force be with you. However, what is power? In the "angel" Obi-Wann Karboi said, "It's something inside all living creatures." But, is it not God?

Police make people like the devil. Luke is a "teaching" the dirty, wizened, dwarf substitute for God, Yoda make things flying in the air TELEKENISIS. This is the devil!

Darth Vader should be a good evil and Owen en. This is not correct. They are evil, because Owen En hope Luke (a desecration of the things the name of the devil, biological) use of such super-senses feeling and get good. George Lucas is telling us that the Jewish Christians, God is not enough, and want us to believe, at a higher secular human force. Tell Jesus, George!

The R2-D2 is the mute false god Baal who children are told is "cool." It so cool when you play God, and that your position? I do not think so!

OK. Full disclosure. I've been a classic SW geek of the first water for years. I won a trivia contest on the original trilogy back in the eighties, at no less a venue than a science fiction convention, where I can promise you the competition is stiff. Even after all these years, I know the odds against successfully navigating an asteroid field (3,720 to one, if you're wondering). But, all that said...I can't make anything resembling sense out of this post! The police force? Where does that come from? Obi-Wann Karboi, Owen En - does this guy have any concept of actual character names (be it noted, he's posting this on a fan fiction site, which seems like a built-in recipe for ridicule all by itself)? R2-D2 is BAAL? Yoda's CGI flying-objects tricks are Satanic? Police make people like the devil?

My only conclusion in response to this one has to be that the individual who posted this was unbelievably high for the SW viewing, the posting, or more likely for both.

And right about now I am all-but-wishing I was in the same boat, perusing these posts...because then they might make something a little more approaching sense, instead of saddening me anew at the way ignorance and denial continue to be held up as American virtues, in some circles.

And just to bug this last poster, I'll close by saying May The Force Be With You.