Republican National Convention - Day 3

Here we are: the climax of the three day, pep-rally we call the 2012 Republican National Convention in Tampa. Tonight, a mystery guest will rally the base, get the crowd excited and emerge as a future leader for the Party. And then, Mitt Romney will take the floor and accept his Party's nomination for President. Ba-zing! If there's anything I could say about this year's convention,    is that the GOP, much like in 2008 when Sarah Palin was introduced to the world, are more excited and prefer a more exciting and charismatic figure like Governor Chris Christie and VP candidate Paul Ryan than the person they got stuck with in Romney. Unfortunately, I'll be stuck in my evening class, so once again, my coverage will be limited.


Edit by Jonathan (4:47 pm): A few notes on tonight's closing ceremonies: Newt Gingrich and Wife #3, Jeb Bush, Clint Eastwood, and then Mitt Romney will all give their speeches, complete with a video montage saluting Reagan. And Samantha Bee delivers some of the best (and funniest) coverage on the shortened three-day even that i've seen.

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Edit by Jonathan (9:25 pm PT): I could talk about Mitt Romney's speech, but i'll leave that for the final recap coming up over the weekend. The only question I have tonight is simple: What the hell, Clint Eastwood?


Edit by Jonathan (9:46 pm PT): I got my picture taken with President Obama. He didn't say much.

Republican National Convention - Day 2

Welcome back to Day 2 of coverage of the Bullshit Parade Republican National Convention in Tampa! Now, yesterday was pretty thin, due to my evening class, so I hope today's coverage is more action packed and infuriating than the last 10 minutes of Chris Christie's keynote address! Speaking of, I promised that I would get to my thoughts of the highlights from last night's dog-and-pony show, and, as promised, here's what I have to say about last night's speeches.....

* First off, there were many speeches given, besides Ann Romney's and Chris Christine. There was Texas Senate candidate Ted Cruz, South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley, Speaker of the House John Bohener, and there's no way i'll be able to comment on all of them tonight, or tomorrow, so you might see them over the weekend, under the gone, but not forgotten files from the Tampa convention.

* Speaking of Mrs. Romney, her speech was terrific. No, really. It was great. One of Mitt's biggest hurdles was trying to come off as likable and relatable to the common man and from his awkward, straight-laced and bland persona, to his refusal to release his tax returns, he's failed to put a human face to his brand and his campaign. Ann not only made Mitt more a genuine and likeable person, but she did well by transferring the early years of the marriage, when the struggled and had a kid on the way, and made that into a story that millions of older voters could connect with. Well done, Ann Romney, I really was impressed, and that's coming from a very liberal person!

*  So, if you're trying to sell Romney's humanity and that he is, for lack of a better term, "one of us", then how do you sell him as a candidate that can get things done in Washington and as a true conservative when he's flip-flopped on just about every issue he stood for when he was Governor of Massachusetts? If your Chris Christie, you barely mention him at all and bolster your own brand name! I don't think i've seen a more self-serving and selfish display of personal gratification. It was the equivalent of the Governor from New Jersey whipping his cock out, jerking off in front of everyone, bragging about how much longer it is than the limp dick they got saddled with, and boasting about how much staying power he has. I know political positioning isn't a new concept during convention time, but never has it been this blatant and unapologetic about it. This speech (filled with one-liners, throwing red-meat and one insulting take about being fearful that the next generation of kids won't know what an American century looks like) was about Christie positioning himself for 2016, than it was about propping up Mitt Romney.

Now, onto tonight's round of rah-rah-rah-ing the home team!

Edit by Jonathan (5:15 pm): John McCain's speech made me thankful that he's nowhere near the Oval Office.

Edit by Jonathan (5:27 pm): McCain said he trusts Romney to lead. This is coming from the same man who trusted that Sarah Palin could be ready to take over if he died or was unable to perform the task appointed to him.

Edit by Jonathan (6:01 pm): A note on convention hats: why?? They always look really ridiculous. Am I watching a convention of a major political party, or is this a Lady Gaga concert?

Edit by Jonathan (6:39 pm): Mike Huckabee about to speak. Brace yourselves, folks...

Edit by Jonathan (6:42 pm): This was the explanation as to why Tim Pawlenty was trending. Best thing I've seen tonight.

Edit by Jonathan (7:03 pm): Mike Huckabee was duller than dogshit on the stage. Condi's takes the podium, and 20 seconds in, she brings up 9/11. What balls of her to bring up an event that her former boss sat on his ass, doing fuck all to respond to a report that said that Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.!

Edit by Jonathan (7:34 pm): Here's Paul Ryan!

Edit by Jonathan (7:45 pm): Ryan: how dare Obama try and make healthcare more affordable for the middle class and college students!!!

Edit by Jonathan (8:00 pm): I hope Joe Biden bitch slaps this little twerp at the VP Debate in October. Paul Ryan is a creep of the first order.

Edit by Jonathan (8;42 pm): Final analysis on the speech: give Ryan this much credit, he knows his base and he plays to them damn well. Oh and what do you know: Paul Ryan's claim that an auto plant closed in his home state under Obama was total bullshit. There are other aspects I want to touch on from Day 2 tonight, but i'll leave that for tomorrow afternoon. Goodnight, folks!

Republican National Convention Coverage: Day 1

Hello all, and welcome to the the equivalent of a Varsity football pep rally known as the Republican National Convention! This time, the GOP takes it's pomp and circumstance to Tampa Florida where for three days (originally, it was slated to be a four-day event, but due to the threat of Hurricane Issac hitting the gulf coast, the official first day was nixed), we'll get delegates in funny hats, bad dance moves, and top figures in the Party getting the base hyped and ready to vote on election day, ending with Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan  accepting the nomination to run against Barack Obama in the General. In other words, i'll be guiding you through all the bullshit because the count can't do it, and RalphyFan is currently on hiatus. Unlike last time when RF and I acted as a fly-on-the-wall through CNN and MSNBC News, I'll be going through the highlights of what was said, what I thought, and some of the bizarre things that will ultimately find it's way out of, and surrounding, the Convention floor.

Update by Jonathan (3:22 pm, PT): I'll be at my Math class from 5-6, so my watching power will be limited, but I can find some great stuff about the Convention, like this following story: Miners in Ohio had to give up their paycheck to attend a mandatory Mitt Romney rally, allegedly.

Earlier this month, Mitt Romney was welcomed for a campaign event at the Century Mine in Beallsville, Ohio, by hundreds of coal workers and their families. Now many of the mine's workers are saying they were forced to give up a day-worth of pay to attend the event, and they feared they might be fired if they didn’t, according to local news radio WWVA.
The claims have been mostly denied by Rob Moore, Chief Financial Officer of Murray Energy Company, which owns the mine. He acknowledges that workers weren’t paid that day but says no one was made to attend the event. Well, kind of.
"Our managers communicated to our workforce that the attendance at the Romney event was mandatory, but no one was forced to attend," he told local news radio WWVA, which has received several emails from workers claiming that the company records names of workers that don't attend those types of events.

Update by Jonathan (4:45 pm, PT): Here's the Republican platform going forward.

TAXES: "We reject the use of taxation to redistribute income, fund unnecessary or ineffective programs or foster the crony capitalism that corrupts both politicians and corporations."
It says a Republican administration would extend the Bush tax cuts of 2001 and 2003, pending reform of the tax code. It says the party would strive to eliminate taxes on interest, dividends and capital gains altogether for lower- and middle-income taxpayers. It also would work to repeal the estate tax and the alternative minimum tax.
The party backs constitutional amendments to balance the federal budget and require a super majority for any tax increases.
MARRIAGE: The platform affirms the rights of states and the federal government not to recognize same-sex marriage. It backs a constitutional amendment defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman.
GUN CONTROL: The party says it opposes legislation intended to restrict Second Amendment rights by limiting the capacity of clips or magazines or otherwise restoring the assault weapons ban passed during the Clinton presidency.
ABORTION: The party states that "the unborn child has a fundamental individual right to life which cannot be infringed." It opposes using public revenues to promote or perform abortion or to fund organizations that perform or advocate abortions. It says the party will not fund or subsidize health care that includes abortion coverage.
MEDICARE and MEDICAID: The platform pledges to move both Medicare and Medicaid away from "the current unsustainable defined-benefit entitlement model to a fiscally sound defined-contribution model." It supports a Medicare transition to a premium-support model with an income-adjusted contribution toward a health plan of the enrollee's choice. Age eligibility in Medicare must be made more realistic in light of longer life spans.
Medicaid services for low income people would be transformed into a block grant program in which the states would be given the flexibility to determine the best programs for their residents.

Edit by Jonathan (7:46 pm, PT): I'm back from my evening class and now i'm watching the Keynote address by Chris Christie of New Jersey.

Edit  by Jonathan (8:11 pm, PT): What litte I caught from Christie's speech, I came away with two things in mind: One - that the vast majority of people in that arena would rather have him be the Nominee than Romney. Two - his speech wasn't so much for advocating Romney in this election cycle than it was making himself a household name within the Republican Party in 2016. I'll have more on his speech tomrrow afternoon.

We Will Have Bullsh... Republican National Convention Coverage

The Great Jonathan Holmes will be doing updates during the big Hoedown in Tampa. We give him a big applause for this because believe me it ain't easy work. Thank You Jonathan!

It's Almost Time For The Bullshit Convention And The Bullshitters Are Getting Nervous

Amy Smith commented 5 hours ago · Flag

Opinions are like A@#holes everybodys got one and they all stink.These are the facts the unemployment rate is double the government numbers. 23 million americans are out of work. The ACLU calls Obama the worst president in history on civil liberties. Obama’s own law professor Roberto Unger has made a VIDEO ASKING PEOPLE NOT TO VOTE FOR HIM. The professor went on to list his complaints:
•”His policy is financial confidence and food stamps.”
•”He has spent trillions of dollars to rescue the moneyed interests and left workers and homeowners to their own devices.”
•”He has delivered the politics of democracy to the rule of money.”
•”He has disguised his surrender with an empty appeal to tax justice.”
•”He has reduced justice to charity.”
•”He has subordinated the broadening of economic and educational opportunity to the important but secondary issue of access to health care in the mistaken belief that he would be spared a fight.”
•”He has evoked a politics of handholding, but no one changes the world without a struggle

She Thought Up "Obutthead" but not Paragraphs.

Denise Estrada commented 2 hours ago · Flag

Obama has spent 4% of his time as President on the economy & jobs and spent about 60% campaigning or events look at Obama own daily schedule off his own website. http://www.whitehouse.gov/schedule/president/2012-07-16 . Obama is the most corrupt President we have ever had! I think he is our very own Celebrity and Thief. His whole Presidency has been nothing but golfing, basket ball, expensive trips, and celebrity parties and hasn’t done nothing but spend our tax money since he has been President like it is his own money. He has been spending our tax to grease the palms of his supporters since day one…giving it to his investors like Solyndra, Evergreen Solar, Amonix Inc., GE, JP Morgan Chase, Goldman Sachs, Tides Foundation, Exelon Corporation, and many others. These are also Obama donors: John Doerr’s venture capital firm, Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers, Daniel Weiss’ Angeleno Group LLC, Theodore Dimon, and Steve Westly’s eponymous Westly Group, SEIU, and GE, which in return they give back contributions to his past and present campaign. Also, this is truly criminal and Obama should be in prison for stealing billions of our tax money to butter the palms of David Axelrod, Rahm Emmanual, and Bill Ayers. Obama has been funneling money through an Illinois-based energy producer Exelon Corporation to these people and other’s who have helped his candidacy and his reelection bid. They are bundlers for Obama and our tax money is being used to make his friends rich. Obutthead is a disgrace! He needs to be in prison for several things like: “Fast and Furious” Gun running which concluded in a board patrol’s murder and then covering it up; Intimating our US Supreme Justices to vote his way on two cases Heath Care Bill and Voter ID laws; Sweeping Black Panther’s voter intimidation case under the table; Starting two Wars in Syria and Yemen without Congressional approval; Leaking US intelligence to the media for improving his image and making his movie. These offenses are all either Impeachable offenses against our Constitution and he should be in prison for cover up’s and he and his administration lying during Congressional hearings. Obama’s very major scandals are getting much airplay or print space in the legacy media. With all the cover-up the mainstream media did in the run-up to the 2008 election and continue to do, they can ill afford to stop now because they know if Obama goes down in a major scandal of such huge criminally corrupt proportions, he takes them down with him. And the Democrat Party becomes a 40-year minority party — if it survives all the scandals. So the lamestream media has to continue to cover up all the thuggish activities, all the obstruction of justice, all the kickbacks, all the pay-to-play, all the corruption that is the Obama administration.

This Guy Is Perfect For Missouri

Great Question MJ

mj - the same one commented Why does “conservative humor” always involve murder?

And Mitt's Running Mate Is...

I Couldn't Be More Pleased.

Edit From The Count:

One good thing about Paul Ryan I  will be able to call him a moron without hearing how sexist I am. My break with DU a site which I was never much of a fan of to begin with became complete when Liberals were telling me I couldn't say anything against Ms Palin because she was a woman. I still remember that one snot nosed little punk who told me I made her sick. I told her losing elections made me sick.