Listen up, righties: I know this may be difficult for you to grasp, but please stay with me, for this is important (yes, it's more important than listening to the latest Toby Keith album you've been playing nonstop in the CD player whilst lazily lapping up the new talking points Sean wants you to repeat like a song that's permanently on repeat) and it'll only take a few minutes to read.
See,
this week, the 'birthers' have somehow found their way back into the national news cycle, beginning with a recorded conservative town hall meeting of a woman who demanded from Delaware Rep. Mike Castle, just why didn't he, and the rest of the Republicans, didn't bring up that allegedly, the 44th President of the United States is not a natural born citizen and that he has not released his birth certificate.
Later on in the week, Chris Matthews had on his show, Rep. Bill Posey (R-Florida) who, months earlier, actually introduced legislation on the House floor, titled
H.R. 1503, stating that from now on, future presidential candidates must provide a copy of their original birth certificate. Sound familiar? This whole charade would make MAD Magazine's 20 Dumbest People, Events, and Things list at the end of the year, if it weren't for the fact that since the bill's introduction into the House, since then, 6 House members have co-sponsored the damn bill, and one Senate member saying he would vote for it, should it come to the Senate floor!
Allow me to veer of course for a bit and address the bill in question. If there was a nastier, more partisan-fueled, and thinly veiled racist bill that was introduced on the House floor and gained a faint heartbeat of traction with certain members of a political party in the last 10 years, then I sure as hell haven't seen, nor heard of it. I know some of you miss the days where the Jim Crow laws were as American as baseball, mom's homemade apple pie, and Ed Sullivan, until them 'radical Negores' (MLK, Malcolm X, Thurgood Marshall etc.) and 'white traitors' (JFK, Lyndon Johnson) fucked it all up for ya'll, but those days are over, and you're just going to have to accept that your granddaughter is probably banging a black man (and enjoying every minute of it, I expect).
Back to the 'birthers.'Now, I want you click on the link
here and read the following paragraph very carefully and very slowly. Read it a few times if you have to.
Barack Obama was born at the Kapi'olani Medical Center for Women & Children in Honolulu, Hawaii, United States,[6] to Stanley Ann Dunham,[7] an American of mainly English descent from Wichita, Kansas,[8][9][10] and Barack Obama, Sr., a Luo from Nyang’oma Kogelo, Nyanza Province, Kenya. Obama's parents met in 1960 in a Russian language class at the University of Hawaii at Mānoa, where his father was a foreign student on scholarship.[11][12] The couple married on February 2, 1961,[13] and Barack was born later that year. His parents separated when he was two years old and they divorced in 1964.[12] Obama's father returned to Kenya and saw his son only once more before dying in an automobile accident in 1982.[14]
Now, I want you to look at the following photographs,
here,
here,
here,
here, and
here.
You say that Obama was not born in the United States. That's bullshit. Her mother, An American citizen, gave birth to him in Honolulu, Hawaii, which is part on the Union.
You say that Obama wont release his actual birth certificate. That's bullshit. Fact Check.org staffers, have seen and photographed in various angles his original birth certificate.
You say that the birth certificate that the Obama campaign released in June was a fraud. That's bullshit. They even zoomed up on certain pieces of the document to try and shut brain-dead, ignorant white trash like you up who have been saying that the document wasn't either signed, the certificate didn't have a raised seal, and so on!
Its time to face the facts: Barack Hussein Obama is a legal resident of the United States. And after all this, if you still believe that he is not...well, to quote comedian Jeff Foxworthy,
"You just might be a redneck."And a real dumbfuck one at that.
( This guy is probably a good guy but he goes by Ranger Bob and he his features are sufficient for our purposes )
which I guess is better than my choice for him which was "Fruity Pebbles"
